I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Are we still banned from the library?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
