if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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