He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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