their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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