Soap is not a condiment
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize