How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
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can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
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My glasses were in the garbage this morning
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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