For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
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