for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
