Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
