So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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