i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
