with your own penis?
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
