Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
