last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
