dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
