i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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