I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Randomize
