Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
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