No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
