I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
