he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Vodka?
Forever.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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