To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
you had me at cake vodka
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
