I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize