batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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