God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
so let's talk penis.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize