I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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