The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
