I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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