I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Randomize
