He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
