Where did you get a picture of my penis
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
