I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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