My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire