Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize