is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize