Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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