This is the prime rib incident all over again
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
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