omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
