Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
