Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
