This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
