on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
