Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
