FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
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