Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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