Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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