i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
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