he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
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