So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
it's great music for shaving your balls
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
