dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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